How Not to Embarrass Yourself in Japan

 It’s almost impossible not to feel a little ungraceful when you’re a tourist in Japan. We blindly show up in this delicate world, where everything from the depth of a bow to the handling of a business card is carefully measured, with no idea that we’re making social faux-pas with every lumbering step. Even worse, Japanese people are typically far too polite to point out if you’re wearing toilet slippers in the middle of a restaurant, so it’s easy to keep making the same mistakes over and over again. Here are a few tips on how to avoid embarrassing yourself in the land of the rising sun.

Take Off Your Shoes

You’re always expected to take off your shoes when entering a Japanese home or ryokan (Japanese-style hotel). Restaurants, shrines and other establishments, however, can be a little more confusing: Sometimes your shoes come off and sometimes they stay on. If you’re not sure what to do, simply look to see if there are slippers laid out at the entrance. If you’re supposed to take your shoes off, there will generally be slippers available for you to wear inside.

Once inside, if you need to use the bathroom, you’ll have to change your slippers again. There will usually be a special pair of toilet slippers sitting at the entrance to the bathroom. Change into the toilet slippers to use the bathroom, and then change back into your other slippers on the way out.

Don’t Eat or Drink While Walking

You’ll notice that there is a frustrating lack of public trash cans in Japanese cities. One of the reasons for this is that Japanese people don’t generally accumulate garbage on the go. Unlike most Western countries where it’s pretty normal to see someone drinking a coffee while crossing the street, it’s considered rude to eat or drink while walking in Japan.  This is one of the things Westerners do that makes Japanese people think we’re a bit sloppy. Admittedly, I can kind of see why they think that running to catch the subway while eating a bagel isn’t exactly the most elegant move.

Use Chopsticks Right

In most restaurants, you’ll find hashi-oki (chopstick rests) sitting on the table. You can lay your chopsticks on one of these rests when you’re not eating, rather than sticking them in your food or crossing them over your bowl, both of which are considered to be bad omens. Also, remember not to gesture at people with your chopsticks, and try not to use them as spears to pick up your food, even if you’re still learning how to use them properly.

Don’t Blow Your Nose in Public

Ever wonder why it’s common for Japanese people to wear surgical masks in public places? Aside from avoiding the spread of viruses, wearing a mask makes it easier to avoid blowing your nose in public if you have a cold. I’ve been told that publicly blowing your nose in Japan is pretty much the equivalent of unapologetic public flatulence in the West. If wearing a surgical mask isn’t your thing, just try to find somewhere private to blow your nose if you’re sick.

Keep It Down

It’s polite to set your cell phone to silent mode and avoid loud phone conversations while riding buses and trains, as well as in quiet places like hotel lobbies and restaurants. Whether or not you’re using a cell phone, it’s a good idea to pay attention to your speaking volume in general.  Japanese people tend to speak softly, and if you’re not careful, you’ll end up sounding like you’re yelling by comparison.

While making an effort to remember a few basic rules is always appreciated, keep in mind that Japanese people know that tourists aren’t always aware of the local customs. They’re usually quick to compliment you on proper chopstick use and other small successes, and if you do mess up, they’re also quick to understand and forgive you.

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